The Sassy Homemaker

How to save a buck

Aug 172010

Remember how I mentioned that I really don’t sew? Well, even I might be able to do this. You know how you buy jeans, and they’re too long, but if you cut them off and hem them, they look — well, as if you cut them off and hemmed them? If you take them to a tailor, you can have them professionally done, and they have some sort of trick where they keep the original hem on so they don’t look funky. Don’t ask how, it’s a mystery! Or rather, it was a mystery, until today. I found a fabulous little tutorial that finally describes the process in a way my non-seamstress brain can understand.

It’s pure brilliance. Go read all about it at Holy Craft. Then save yourself some cash and hem your own jeans!

A Cupboard Full of Fun

Family Fun

Aug 162010

My sassy neighborhood has been seeing some impressive thunderstorms in the last few weeks. When it’s summer, and the kids are home, and you’re all crammed under one soggy roof, it’s a perfect time to raid the game cupboard. Especially if the storm has taken out your favorite babysitter, the tv/computer/game system. Here are my tried and true recommendations for a rainy afternoon:

For the Wee Ones

You can’t go wrong with Candyland. You might scream inside the third time your child is sent back to the beginning, and you might start stacking the deck with double purple cards to make sure the game finally ends, but your child will love it.

Chutes and Ladders teaches kids to count, but they’ll be having too much fun to realize they’re learning. Sure, they might have a meltdown if they hit the long chute, but it’s all part of the game. They’ll learn either good sportsmanship, or good ways to cheat.

It might be politically incorrect, but Old Maid is still a favorite around here. It’s hard not to laugh when your kid has one card sticking up above the others in his hand in a transparent effort to make you choose the Old Maid. Sometimes I deliberately choose that one, pretending I’m shocked and dismayed when I see which card it is, just to hear the belly laughs that ensue.

For the Elementary Kids

When kids can read and do math and strategize, it’s a perfect time to introduce them to Pit. This has been a family favorite since I was a kid myself, sitting around the table with my parents and siblings, wondering who was hogging all the wheat, and trying to slip the bear to an unsuspecting player along with some innocent corn. Lively, loud, and fast-paced, this game is fun for the whole family.

Want to teach your kid good manners? Try a game of Sorry. They’ll learn to apologize a lot (though they probably won’t mean it) as they send each other’s players back to the start as often as possible.

No family’s game cupboard is complete without a deck of Uno cards. There are endless variations on this classic game, but just one deck played the old-fashioned way is still a hit.

For the Older Crowd

Teenagers and adults alike love Clue at our house. We’ve made a few alterations to the rules to make things a little more fair, or at least a little less frustrating. Miss Scarlett never had it so good.

I’ve got a Ticket to Ride, and I’m enjoying the trip. This game sounds like a yawner (I have to build a train route before anyone else? Whee.), but it’s more fun than you’d think. A favorite hereabouts. We have the Europe version, but the USA version is good, too. I prefer Europe, but that’s probably because I’m pretentious.

If you haven’t ever played The Settlers of Catan, you’re missing out. Strategy and luck play equal roles in this addictive game. It’s different every time, thanks to the unique board design, which takes time to set up, but is worth the effort.

It Takes Two

Only have two people, and not in the mood for a tango? Break out the Backgammon. The rules seem complicated at first, but once you get the hang of it, it’s easy. The Sassy Husband and I have been known to build a date night around this game.

I don’t know why I like Mastermind so much. Maybe it’s because I feel so smart when I figure out the answer. Logic, deductive reasoning, and let’s face it, a little luck, make this game a consistent favorite.

Party Time

One of my favorite games for a crowd is Taboo. Describe the clue without using any of the forbidden words on the card. It’s tricky. And hilarious. And oh so much fun.

Another good group game is Outburst. If you’re lucky, your team will get an easy topic like “household appliances”, while the other team gets “Stanley Kubrick films”. Feel free to point and laugh. Your turn will come, my pretties. You will get “Famous boxers from 1942″. Good luck.

Another winner: Scattergories. Yes, I know, another word-based and/or trivia game. The Sassy Husband doesn’t like these games, but this isn’t his blog, so he doesn’t get a say. Me, I love having to think of a car, an actor, and a food that all start with, say, the letter E. (Edsel, Ethel Merman, Egg, woot!). Great game.

If you have the right group of people, Curses is the funniest game you will ever play in your life. But I stress, it has to be the right kind of people. You know which friends those are, the ones who will play along and not die of embarrassment that they’re having to mutate into a werewolf while talking in a falsetto voice and pretending their hands are attached to their shoulders. Killjoys need not apply.

There you have it, straight from Sassy’s game closet. Go. Play. Enjoy.

Linked to 11th Heaven

Sassy's a little busy

Uncategorized

Jul 302010

I’m coming back, I promise. I’ve been on vacation. And sorting through stacks of soccer forms, trying to organize teams. And this week, caring for an injured-but-still-sassy daughter. The only tutorials I could give right now are “how to order pizza” and “how to ignore the fact that you’re fourteen loads behind on laundry.”

And I’m pretty sure you can figure those out for yourselves.

Gooey Caramel Corn

Family Fun, In the Kitchen, Recipes, Stuff I love, Tutorials

Jul 132010

Looking for a gift for the neighbors? A rainy-day activity for the kids? A cure for your sweet tooth?

How about some caramel corn?

Start by popping some popcorn. I use an air popper, so I feel less guilty about all the goop I’m adding to it later. This recipe is enough for one average batch of popcorn (about 1/2 cup unpopped kernels).

Now dig out the corn syrup you never use. It’s finally getting its day in the sun!

Measure 2 tablespoons of corn syrup into a microwave-safe bowl. If you don’t have corn syrup, you can use 7 large marshmallows. But the corn syrup is better. Much better.

Now add 1/2 cup butter to the bowl. Hey, nobody said this was low-fat.

Now you need 1/2 cup brown sugar. Is it hard and crunchy? Here’s a tip on how to soften it.

Put the bowl in the microwave for about 3 minutes on high, or until the mixture is melted and bubbling. Could you do this on the stove instead? Yes. Would it take longer? Yes.

This is what it should look like. Mamma mia.

Now add 1/4 teaspoon baking soda.

Stir it in, and put the bowl back in the microwave for another 30 seconds.

While it’s cooking, get out some waxed paper. Find a surface somewhere in your kitchen that is mostly free of toys, and lay out the paper.

Get the finished bowl-o’-goodness out of the microwave and pour the caramel over the popcorn.

Mix, mix, mix, til you just can’t mix no more. Make sure to get all the caramel that likes to party at the bottom of the bowl.

When everything is nicely coated, turn the popcorn onto the waxed paper to cool.

What you see is actually a double batch. Don’t freak out. If you are planning to form popcorn balls, or make gift bags, or anything other than just chowing down, now is the time to do it, while it’s still warm.

Personally, I’m just gonna fill a small bowl (several times) and munch.

No-Bake Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies

In the Kitchen, Recipes, Tutorials

Jul 122010

The first thing you need to know about no-bake cookies is that, though it’s true they don’t have to be baked, they still have to be cooked. So you’re gonna need a pan and a stove.

The second thing you need to know about no-bake cookies is that you need to make some. Right now. I dare you to resist.

Start with 1/2 cup butter. Real butter. You’ll thank me later.

Melt the butter over medium heat. Stir it so it doesn’t scorch, because I promise you, you will taste the scorched butter in the cookies.

Measure 1/2 cup milk. I’m using 1% because that’s how we roll. If you’re feeling decadent you can really live it up and use 2%.

Add the milk to the melted butter.

Add two cups sugar. Stir! Because burned sugar is even worse than scorched butter.

Measure 1/4 cup cocoa. That’s unsweetened baking cocoa, not Nesquik or Swiss Miss drink mix. Unsweetened.

Add the cocoa to the pan.

Stir it all together. If it’s lumpy, use a whisk. It’s probably simmering a little at this point.

Wait til it comes to a rolling boil, then let it bubble for a full minute.

Remove from heat, and add 1 teaspoon vanilla extract. I love the steam in this picture. Looks like haunted vanilla.

Add a dash of salt. A “dash” is a technical term, meaning “dump a little in your hand and sprinkle it into the pan.”

Now add 1/2 cup peanut butter. I suppose you could use chunky, but I’m not sure there’s anything in the world more luscious than Jif smooth peanut butter. Choosy moms choose Jif, you know.

Scoop out the peanut butter and dump it in the pan. Go ahead, use your finger, you know you want to.

Now stir the peanut butter into the chocolate mixture, and try not to drool into the pan. It throws off the moisture content.

When it’s all melty and blendy, add 3 cups oatmeal. Rolled oats. Old-fashioned works better than instant, but you can use instant in case of a chocolate emergency.

Mix it all together. You could sneak a taste, but it’s still pretty hot.

Now spoon it into a baking dish. Even though we’re not baking it, a long, flat dish like this is perfect.

Spread it out to the edges, filling in the corners, and leaving plenty on the spoon to lick off later.

Yeah, like that. That’s some good eatin’, there.

Let it cool. I usually put it in the fridge, because let’s face it, time is of the essence when we’re talking about chocolate.

Serve it up with a cold glass of milk and an exercise DVD.

Celebrate July 4th in Patriotic Style

Family Fun, In the Kitchen, Recipes, Stuff I love

Jul 022010

The 4th of July means food, fun, fireworks, friends, family, and fattening festivities. If you want to make a patriotic splash at the party this year, try these star-spangled ideas:

When it comes to kids (including this particularly adorable one, who happens to be mine), a little red, white and blue can go a long way.

The Girl Who Ate Everything shows how to make this fabulous trifle, along with many other yummies, on her blog. Check it out!

This cute and easy craft will keep your kids occupied while they’re waiting for the fun to begin. An eagle made of hand- and foot-prints? I’m in! Check out the tutorial at Free Kids Crafts.

Photo source: http://www.organizeyourstuffnow.com

Are you hosting the party this year? Is your home sadly unfestive? Here’s a great last-minute idea, very cute, very cheap, and very easy. I love these flags in tins! You can find the tutorial at Organize and Decorate Everything.

Image source: karaspartyideas.blogspot.com

And finally, I think this might be the cutest thing I’ve ever seen, cuter than puppies, cuter than Zac Efron. A watermelon, hollowed out, and used as a drink dispenser, with a spigot. A spigot, I tell you! Check out the whole post over at Kara’s Party Ideas.

And now, my sassy wish for you:

May your fireworks be spectacular, may your tummy be full, may you be surrounded by loved ones, and may you have Monday off to recuperate.

Happy Independence Day!

Product Review: Bosch Universal Mixer

In the Kitchen, Random Sassiness, Reviews

Jun 142010

The Bosch Universal Kitchen Machine ticks me off. It sits there in my kitchen, taunting me, making me feel guilty. I mean, if it didn’t work very well, that would be one thing. I’d just taunt it right back. But the thing is, it’s really, really good. It makes everything easy. It’s powerful and efficient, kneading bread dough with ease and making cookies worth killing for without breaking a sweat.

So I’m mad at the Bosch Universal Mixer. Because now I have no excuse for avoiding baking. And my hips are loving every bite.

Pros: strong, powerful, efficient, has many attachments (sold separately) that turn it into a food processor, meat grinder, juicer, grain mill, etc. Truly universal.

Cons: not nearly as pretty on your countertop as the Kitchenaid, attachments are expensive.

Bottom line: pricey, but worth the money.

Dads Need Love Too

Family Fun, Random Sassiness, Stuff I love

Jun 082010

Father’s Day is coming up, and it’s hard to find a gift that isn’t a) a tie, b) a shirt, or c) uh…a tie. Why is it so hard to buy for men? But not this year. Check out these groovy gifts:

If your guy is going green, check out this great sale on solar kits. The Sassy Husband would love to be able to use his gadgets and save the earth at the same time.

How about letting the kids make this cute –er, I mean manly — grilling apron from Family Fun? Bribe Dad with some new grill accessories and put him to work.

For the intellectual with a sense of humor, you can’t go wrong with these adorable Freudian Slippers. I’m in love.

And of course, if you really can’t get out of the necktie rut, at least take a look at these beauties. And they’re on sale!

Traveling With Kids and Other Stupid Ideas

Family Fun, Travel

Jun 042010

(to the tune of “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad”)

I’ve been driving on the freeway

All the live-long night.

I’ve been driving on the freeway

But the end’s still not in sight.

Can’t you hear the baby cryin’

Risin’ up so early in the morn.

Can’t you hear the kiddos shouting,

“Trucker, blow your horn!

Mom, I’m really bored,

Dad, I gotta pee,

Molly just threw up all over me.

Jordan kicked my chair,

Steven breathed my air.”

How much longer til I’m free?

~The Sassy Homemaker

The Great American Road Trip. No matter how you try to avoid it, you will eventually have to leave the house with your children. And don’t think you get out of it if you’re not American. Rumor has it that other countries have cars, too. And roads. And kids. To ease the pain, here are some tried-and-true tips from a mom of four sassy children.

If their mouths are full, they can’t argue. Give each child their own snack kit, filled with nutritious finger foods that they can eat on their own schedule. Carrot sticks, raisins, cheese sticks, apple slices, grapes, pretzels, crackers, peanut butter for dipping, whatever they like. Stay away from things that drip, ooze, or splatter.
If it’s sticky, it will find its way to your child’s hands. Keep a package of wet wipes in the car for easy cleanup, and a roll of paper towels for spills. These also come in handy when the guy at the drive-through forgets to give you napkins, as usual.
Motion sickness is real, and it’s evil. If any of your children tend toward carsickness, I suggest the following: get leather seats (trust me, it’s worth the added expense), give the kids Dramamine at least a half hour before you start driving, and keep Ziploc bags in the pocket of every seat in the car. Please be aware that throwing vomit-filled plastic bags out of your car window is considered poor form..
If you just passed the last rest stop for the next 80 miles, your child will immediately need to use the bathroom. We have a policy of Enforced Peeing in our family. If one person needs to go, everyone goes. Stopping for gas, food, switching drivers, stretching legs? Everyone goes. Learn it. Use it.
Never underestimate the power of an electronic babysitter. When the license plate game, alphabet game, twenty questions, and I spy have lost their thrill, and you’ve sung every verse of every song you know, in a round, it’s time to haul out the big guns. I’m talking about electronics, also known as lobotomizers. Turn those puppies on, and your kids will stare and drool for a good two hours. DVD player, iPod, DSi, whatever you’ve got.

If you will be going on the road this summer, here are some good resources: Road Trip America has all sorts of fabulous road trips mapped out for you. Roadside America helps you find those odd roadside attractions that are pure Americana, like the world’s biggest firecracker, or a button museum. What are your favorite road trip tips?

Spring Cleaning Challenge: Day 14

Cleaning, Keeping House, Tutorials

May 182010

Two weeks of drudgery have led up to this, the Holy Grail of cleaning: the refrigerator. Once it’s finished, you will know that you have well and truly conquered your house.

Start with the freezer, if you have one. If it’s frost-free (and it probably is), just clean out old, expired food and wipe down the inside of the space. If it’s not frost-free, you will need to turn it off and defrost it. You can scrape the frost out, or let it melt on its own (although your frozen food will be not-so-frozen by then). If you’re in a hurry, you can take a blow dryer to it.

With the freezer nicely coiffed, you can work on the fridge. Remove everything that can possibly be removed, including shelves and drawers.

Wipe down the inside of the fridge, paying special attention to the bottom, where leaking maple syrup and spilled orange juice like to congregate. Don’t forget the inside of the door.

Wash racks, shelves, and drawers in hot, soapy water in the sink. Rinse, dry, and replace in fridge.

Now start putting the food back in. But don’t just toss it in all willy-nilly; there will be plenty of time for that later, when the kids start rummaging through all the food while complaining that there’s nothing to eat.

Check each item before you put it back in. If it’s expired, or smells funny, or you’re not even quite sure what it used to be, throw it out. If it’s still good, wipe it with a clean, wet cloth and put it back in the fridge. If it’s chocolate, hide it in your sock drawer for emergencies.

Wipe down the outside of the fridge, including the top. If you are abnormally strong, or possess strong family members, move the fridge out and clean behind it as well. Make sure to clean the handle well, and don’t ignore the seal on the door. It needs some love.

If you can’t clean the outside of the fridge because there are far too many school projects, appointment cards, wedding announcements and “it’s so cute, I have to buy it” magnets cluttering up the place, welcome to the club.

And you’re done. Finished. The end. Your house is spotless. Now go enjoy what’s left of the spring weather, and think about how you get to do it all over again next year.

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